{"id":161,"date":"2019-12-07T15:47:01","date_gmt":"2019-12-07T21:47:01","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/knowyouraudience.net\/?p=161"},"modified":"2019-12-18T10:28:31","modified_gmt":"2019-12-18T16:28:31","slug":"zero-aces-the-value-of-extended-family","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/knowyouraudience.net\/?p=161","title":{"rendered":"Zero ACEs: The Value of Extended Family"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

To  write this second Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs) blog, I reviewed the first blog and realized it was my typical technical<\/em><\/strong> approach to problem solving based on 40 years in the computer industry.  For the past 10 years, I have been a leadership consultant strongly teaching that most difficult problems are adaptive,<\/em><\/strong> i.e. they deal with people and their interactions.  This website, Know Your Audience,<\/strong><\/em> and its Platinum Rule<\/em><\/strong> theme and related Platinum Communications<\/em><\/strong> content all focus on people\/adaptive problems.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

ACEs is an adaptive problem, so I reflected\non how that influences what I write next. \nConvincing people to take ACEs seriously, requires they take me\nseriously.  One method is to be\nvulnerable and share my personal life, so readers can know me.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

What \ndoes Larry Walker know about ACEs? \nZero.  Until I heard Nadine Burke\nHarris speak, I knew nothing about ACEs. \nZero.  I now know something, but\nonly what I read.  How do I feel<\/em><\/strong>\nabout ACEs?  Personally, I am outraged\nthat a public epidemic is raging, and people in power are not acting.  Have I \u2018experienced\u2019 <\/em><\/strong>an ACEs\nevent?  No.  I  have\nnow; however, met and talked with people who have \u2013 and \u2013 their life perspective\nis foreign to me.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I experienced a  different childhood than those impacted by\nACEs.  My family history is this.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Grandpa Walker, Leonard, owned 40 acres of woods close to International Falls, Minnesota.  Since farming in northern Minnesota is a no-win proposition, he worked in the paper mill as did many towns people.  As his children grew up, he broke up his farm, giving land to each as they married and started families.  When my parents, Cy and Elnor, married, they received a couple acres for their first house.  Side Note:<\/em><\/strong> they proceeded to build their first home for $92: a 4-room log cabin made with trees cut on the property and family building help.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Growing up, I lived next door to Grampa\nLeonard and Gramma Viva, Aunt Edna and Uncle Ted, Uncle Dick and Aunt Jean, and\nUncle Kenny and Aunt Nettie.  Uncle Cecil\n(orphan relative) and Aunt Chris built on an adjacent block, and Ted\u2019s brother\nmoved next door to Ted and Edna.   The\nBriggs family home was adjacent to Grampa\u2019s, and they were as close as\nfamily.  A Brigg\u2019s daughter married and\nmoved into the neighborhood.  My two\nolder cousins did as well.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Among all these families (Walkers and\nBriggs), I was the only boy child.  I\nremember forming \u2018armies\u2019 (all girls) and leading them around.  If they would not mind, I threatened to go\nhome.  With a dozen homes and multiple\nacres of land plus unlimited woods just beyond, we had vistas for running, playing,\nexploring.  If thirsty, just stop into\nthe nearest house for a drink.  If making\ntoo much noise, just move away from the houses.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I was always special growing up.  Doing well in school earned praise.  Mom supported me with \u2018homework\u2019.  While not a great athlete, family was happy\nwhen I became the basketball team scorekeeper. \nHolidays and birthdays meant an extended family gathering with food,\ndrinks, and stories galore.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Reflecting on this up-bringing, I cannot\nthink of any trauma.  Just the opposite;\nI may have created the first family trauma \u2013 being the first to leave town.  This was even true for older cousins who\nmarried and moved into \u2018Walker Row\u2019.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Given this solid foundation, I knew that\nif I needed help, it was there.  This\nconfidence moved me fearlessly ahead in life.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

This reflection reveals the chasm\nbetween me and those inflicted by ACEs. \nI must listen and avoid mapping my life experience to theirs.  They have life paths very different from\nmine.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Together, we will merge perspectives to\nfind common ground to make a difference. \nThat is our intent.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

To  write this second Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs) blog, I reviewed the first blog and realized it was my typical technical approach to problem solving based on 40 years in the computer industry.  For the past 10 years, I have been a leadership consultant strongly teaching that most difficult problems are adaptive, i.e. they deal…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"nf_dc_page":"","om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[29],"tags":[27,22,46],"class_list":["post-161","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-adverse-childhood-experiences","tag-aces","tag-aspirations","tag-extended-family"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/knowyouraudience.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/161","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/knowyouraudience.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/knowyouraudience.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/knowyouraudience.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/knowyouraudience.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=161"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/knowyouraudience.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/161\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":164,"href":"https:\/\/knowyouraudience.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/161\/revisions\/164"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/knowyouraudience.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=161"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/knowyouraudience.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=161"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/knowyouraudience.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=161"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}